Puppy asking omg why

Sold a pup

don’t you just love that phrase? Sold a pup. to be swindled. Talked into getting something you didnt neccessarily want or need.

What I find sad, and it is something that has the capability of actually depressing the fuck out of me, is that eventually the good ones (clients) end up believing that they have been sold a pup. Somewhere along the way they stop remembering how we got started and end up thinking (somewhat rightly) that we have created a relationship… but the beginning always stands in the way and inevitably I get whapped in the face with the fact that I am ‘just a PSO’ and that I am ‘being paid’ to give them attention.

As if the almighty dollar has that much sway on whether or not I block you, give you bad phone, or am attentive and interested in you. You’d think that after nine years I would stop being surprised.

sadly, I am an optimist. 

Today I got pride and prejudice in the mail as well as a book, lies my teacher told me, from MG. It was a very nice present– I like presents. not as much as I like videotaping someone while they torture themselves at my behest though.

ttyl

Tomorrow my sis and I are off  to get blue and purple hair, hooray! Then on Thursday I am going to the Getty Villa. For a month I have been fretting over money to have enough for the Getty and then my engine dies and needs rebuilding. *sigh*

Thank god for miracles, and kindly family member

From 11 Years Ago

Now, some girls might say, “I’ve had an account for 7 years but I only started taking calls two weeks ago.” I laugh in the face of that.

My feedback laughs with me.

I love my job, it’s a vocation for me, not a paycheck.

Gladly, I am a straight-ho and love knowing that what I could give away for free and some silly girls do already, I get paid for. It gives me a tingle in my panties.

Secretary

I just finished watching one of my favorite movies, Secretary. I was making something for a sweet sub friend of mine and promised her that I would watch the movie while I made her present. She hasn’t seen the movie before, so I am sending it along with the present, I hope she likes it.
There’s something just magical about the movie, I love it that much. Maybe not Star Wars love it, because who am I kidding, I couldn’t love it as much as Star Wars (and the thought of Darth Vader ordering me… using the force on me… to only eat four peas with my single spoonful of creamed potatoes is kind of creepy and not in a good way) but I love it nonetheless.

I empathize with both of the characters. There’s a heavy bit of empathy towards the character of Lee, the Secretary, for both her inner struggles and the way her need or want for pain blossoms. But there’s also a tremendous strength in her, she meets Edward–the dominant– head to head, submissively but in a way that manages to let her hold her own. She is what I would like to think of as the perfect submissive, someone who is submissive by choice and a hundred percent sure of that choice. I also admire her spunk and the way she commands his attention.

On the other hand, in Edward I empathize with his inner turmoil. As hard as it is for someone to admit that they like pain (we are wired to dislike pain, it’s instinctual) socially we are taught nearly from birth that it is even worse to want to give pain. The pleasure he takes in her discomfort is unsettling to him, even though it is pleasurable. He feels conflicted and it’s a conflict I understand completely. I also just love how totally and completely he fucks with her mind– this isn’t simple tie me up and spank me stuff here, this is the real deal.

Best quote of the movie:
E. Edward Grey: Look, we can’t do this 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
Lee: Why not?

Why not indeed. I am seriously hoping my friend likes the movie as much as I did– she should do. At only 364 days younger than me, we are pretty close in personalities. Except for how submissive she is.

side note. I like side notes, don’t you? Two things are on my mind at the moment. One is a will I won’t I sort of thing, and the other is JUST HOW GOOD it is to be back and taking calls on a regular basis. It feels fantastic to be talking to people again… and to be receiving little gifts as well.